my life has been quite happening since i came back.
for starters, the *initial* airport arrival was truly disastrous... all because of the stupid flight which got delayed at the 11th hour... and the events which followed upsetted me quite a bit... cos i didn't manage to eat my curry puff (partly? haha)... but i'm fine now la...
Q already knows what happened (*smiles*)... as for the rest of you... well, i do want to keep it behind me.. so.. i shan't go into the details here. however, my closer friends (you know who you are) are allowed to probe abit. haha. in private.

my family's really really sweet. 9 of them (and i mean NINE... like.. the number after 8! the 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 that 9!!!! i realise i'm being very irritating. wahahaha.) turned up to pick me up from the airport. so touched! i felt like a rock star! haha... (ok, kidding.) there was (in no order of merit, thank you) yandao, pat, fat blob, van, fd, cmm, clm, nn and uncle R. all the sadness seemed to disappear when i spotted yandao and fat blob's familiar figures from afar... it felt really good... it felt like...
home.

watched "tuxedo" with Z. (thanks for the recommendation, guys!) it was cool... typical jackie chan movie but i enjoyed all the fighting and action (talk about being violent hehehe). another plus point was (*blush blush*) jennifer love hewitt. *dodges all rotten eggs and tomatoes*, then continues... "isn't she such a charmer?" *this time dodging all parangs and knives. and choppers*

fine. whichever way you like --- but i STILL know... (i mean, "love") jennifer love hewitt. (last summer? no. i still do, right now. really.)
sounds cool doesn't it? "i love jennifer love hewitt."

jo is such a smooth snooper. managed to sneak up on me without me giving him any information. should consider getting a part-time job as private eye or spy... hehehe. oh, but one thing - remember not to hide behind the LEMON GRASS. ain't no good snooping place *wink wink*. same goes for 199 shops. wahahaha.

i still have my HOI essay.
forgive me, claire. it really wasn't intentional.
*bows*.

got introduced to you by a friend
you were cute and all that
baby you set the trend (yes you did)
the next thing i know
we're down at the cinema
sitting there you start kissing me
what's that about?

[Don't say you love me, M2M]

yessss.
i'm done with the exams and gonna be leaving for the 3.35pm flight later back to "sin city" (thank you, jo.)
can't believe this week whizzed by so quickly... 2 weeks ago i was still grumbling about having so much work to do and all the crap about studying... now that the nightmare (on swanston street? hehe) is over, i'm all geared up and ready to chiong my way through orchard road, suntec, city hall... hehe. it gets exciting thinking about these familiar places now, when for the past few months it was just nike melbourne, bourke street, chinatown (err...), mid city!! hahaha...

got LOTS of errands to run.

1) stanley's nomad has to be given to his brother, (who apparently doesn't like going to town), to upload songs for him. i am going to town. his brother doesn't like going to town. suggestions, anyone? ps: the family lives in bedok. i live in serangoon. bleh.

2) printer cartridges in australia cost BOMBS. i'm supposed to go to sim lim square to get one for stanley. lucky its located a stone's throw away from church =)

3) newater project - collect information on behalf of the class. just because i am the only one going back. fine fine! *grumbles* haha. kidding la =) i'm always ever willing to serve the E&D class. right guys? no?

"kenn, you come up here and make the girls work." (sheesh!)

4) meeting up with kenn's dad to collect newater information. once again, thank you, it's me.

5) sebastianne's 3310

6) check out price of the latest nokia gadget - the digital cam with mobile phone thingy? i forgot who asked me to do that... oops.

7) ellen's laptop! *keeping my fingers crossed on this one*

talk about a busy holiday.

someone called to ask who "C" is - the one with the "nice physique". haha.
what was he thinking, i wonder?
that i am much smarter than "the average bear"?
(btw, "someone" - is that meant to be a compliment or otherwise?)
so... i would like to know, what does he consider an "above average bear"?
paddington?
*winks at piggy and rolls over hysterically with laughter*
sorry knnb, will explain to you in private.
hahahaha.


just caught goldmember a few hours ago.
it has been a long time since i laughed so damn hard... it felt like an "earth-shattering" laughing experience.
mini me was just.... HILARIOUS. (thanks piggy, i realise i like this word alot now. *grins*)

Z, through sms - "aiya i know you surely like watching these kinda shows la hor..."
gee.. made me seem so low classed and brainless... like, i am the type who appreciates such lame, slapstick humour.
well, but then again, i do enjoy them, i have to admit.

ooo!!! i left my crutches at the door again! help!

zs - who said that it was stupid? loved it from beginning till the end!
*yeah baby, yeah!!*
gonna rent the videos for austin's 1st and 2nd this holiday... what's wrong with me? I didn't catch any one of them!!!


all of a sudden
the whole world goes into darkness
and love
crumbles in silence
to
bits
and
pieces.

the most dreaded exam of the week, psychology -- is finally over.
ok, so it wasn't fantastic. it wasn't even what i would call "good"... but at least i didn't come out of the exam hall in tears. bleh.
when maureen told us to "start studying now" 3 weeks before the paper, we were still busy with our monologues, HOI essays (errr..?) and the 2 disgusting E & D projects. i only STARTED touching the damn psych notes during the weekend. and i mean, like... 3 days ago.

i hate roses. those with thorns. (piggy & knnb will know the underlying meaning. heh.)

2 more papers before i'm done with the exams and catching the plane back home.
hooray =)
everyone seems to be excited about it.
aww... you shouldn't have.


no matter how your heart is dreaming
if you keep on believing
the dreams that you wish
will come true
[cinderella - a dream is a wish your heart makes]

hey! ain't these mini M&Ms cute? just took this M&M test and this is what they told me... i'm a mini!!! haha... how true huh? *wink wink*

it's been 2 hours since the end of my literature "exam" on the screwed up Greek king Oedipus and his ultra pathetic life. not forgetting his screwed up wife (also his mother - see what i mean?) okay, for those of you in the dark, Oedipus killed his dad, married his MUM and had not one, not two, not three, but FOUR children with her. ewww. talk about being a HB - pooh's most favourite 2 words *wink wink*.
boy... aren't the Greeks screwy... anyone got a screwdriver? can unscrew them abit... *heh heh*

in fact, i don't know if i should call it an EXAM... cos it only weighs 10 percent of my whole english mark? okay, i guess every little bit matters still. geez. i'd be glad if i got half of ten. i mean, although i did the necessary preparations and crap, writing it down on paper was just a different thing altogether. it's at times like these when i wished i had more experience with english lit in school. piggy, knnb and pooh (he wrote like ELEVEN pages?! or so i heard) seem to be breezing through all this crap! freaks me out... well maybe some people just have the THING for english lit... and unfortunately i don't. i haven't done lit since sec 2. and that was like, what? 5 years ago!

5 days more to going home... feels so so good. i can smell the air from singapore already... ha ha. though it's only gonna be for one week... ok la, not that i'm complaining... have been wanting to go home since forever man... *smiles*

today i realised that C has a nice physique.
impressive - i like.
sshh.

and i don't want the world to see me
cos i don't think that they'd understand
when everything's made to be broken
i just want you to know who I am
[iris - goo goo dolls]

yesterday was perhaps one of my most miserable mid-autumn festivals ever. there was no full moon, no mooncake, and neither was i with my family. on top of everything else, the exams are coming.

mum smsed to ask how my first "zhong qiu jie" outside of home was, and the 4 words "you yue bing ma?" started my water-tap running.
don't know why... it's probably at these times when i simply miss home alot. and the chinese characters just seemed so heartwarming. it's a feeling hard to describe. when i forwarded the msg to piggy, she told me she teared too.
aww. the power of mummies.

while i was keying in my reply, i thought of telling her that i love her. i have never done so before my whole life, and i don't think i ever will. i sat there for practically five minutes thinking whether i should. in the end, even after getting a positive response from piggy, i still couldn't bring myself to do it.
geez.

miss my mum - always the first voice i hear every morning.
miss my yandao - his lame and corny jokes never fail to amuse me. oh yes, and if it wasn't obvious enough, yep... he calls me "chioboo". (it doesn't have to be a true reflection though. *wink wink*)
miss nidz - her cooking.
miss fat blob - nope, i don't think he has lost weight. FAT chance!
miss *hungry* jack - the hot, juicy gossip. the good, the bad, and the ugly.
miss johan (and chijmes!) - hey... i really do :)
miss xueqi - or else i wouldn't have called right? :)
miss zhishan & xiaohui - obviously?

and, thanks to knnb who jammed these thoughts into my head...
i miss H - though he seems to be coping pretty well with everything now.
funnily enough, i am not feeling good about it.
fine. just call me selfish. or whatever word you deem fit.
(and i say hey-ey-ey-ey... what's going on?)

someone give me a time machine.


ok, this rhyme sounds really lame... but i'm feeling kinda nolstalgic.
allow me ---

i see the moon, the moon sees me.
God bless the moon, and God bless me.

hmm.... amen?

everyone around me is missing home.

okay, perhaps we are missing home all the time, but as the exams draw nearer and the pressure starts coming down heavier, the thoughts of going home just seem so much stronger.

piggy misses her folks and... well, naturally, her other close bitches/sluts/hussies. (okay, friends.)
knnb (i still don't know WHY she wants to be called knnb, of all names in the world) just had her 20th birthday on the 18th. felt really bad we couldn't give her a better celebration... becos of the oncoming exams. on top of everything else, her lio is somewhere at field camp back home and couldn't even call or msg to wish her happy birthday.
sigh.

i think it really sucks when it's your birthday and you have to be so far away from home, for one thing.
it sucks too, when it's the exam period and your friends have to squeeze out whatever free time they have to get you presents and prepare your birthday surprise. (but don't worry knnb, we'll definitly make it up to you.... with a goldmember treat! hehe!)
its bad enough having to celebrate it without your significant other (well if you have one, that is), let alone THINKING about how you used to celebrate it with him or her the previous year... or years, for that matter.
and for my dearest knnb, he couldn't even CALL.

a sudden realisation --- my turn's coming in 4 months.
this is NOT a hint, to those of you reading this! haha.
but then again, my 20th will be spent in melbourne too.
then piggy's. then sebastianne's. (no there is no feminine version for the name sebastian. this is a fictitious one.. hehe)
the list goes on and on.

and yes, after talking about piggy and knnb missing their homes and special somebodies...

i miss Z.
very much.

I am 16% evil. Take the test :: koolplace.com

uh... so i'm going to heaven then?

6 days to the first paper and we're still choked right up to the throats with the neverending pile of assignments, projects and worst of all, lessons. *frowns* okay, so we had an extension of seneca up till the following monday, but there's still so much work to do. so much to study. don't know where to start. *double frown*

was with the beanie (and MEANIE!!) gang at *where else?* again. spent some time at target looking at clothes. CLOTHES!! just 6 days before the exam. huh?! everything i tried couldn't FIT. hey hey don't get the wrong idea. they were all too BIG for me so i couldn't fit!!! *just WHAT exactly were you thinking about, you MEAN PIG?!* geez!

on the way home we saw something (in fact SOMEONE) who was so so so so so freaky, it's really... oh man *shudders at the recurring sight in my head* it's really a sight that's beyond description.... it's so scary that i don't even dare TYPE it out... oh man... *straightens face* ok. *ahemz* as the 3 of us were walking down chinatown street, piggy suddenly stopped dead in her tracks, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. i looked where her eyes were fixed at, and saw.... and i saw... *shivers* (someone call the ambulance! i can't breathe!)

to our right, stood the most horrific scene we ever saw in our whole 19-20 years. CONFIRM man!!!! there was this dark figure (an old woman with weird hair) standing in an alley, back-facing us! oh man! it's just so hard describing it! if only you were there to see it! geez! and the darkness of the alley really topped up everything. it was just the scariest scene i ever saw in my whole life. worser than those in the movies! this time it's for real!

it was then my turn to become wide-eyed and open-mouthed (with "retardation", or so piggy says. haha). i gasped and started running away without any warning. piggy and knnb didn't know what was going on so they started running too! ha ha!!

phew. i hope i never see that woman again. the worst part was, i always see her around the streets of melbourne. yes... the same exact woman... her hair is unmistakable man. hmm.. how on earth am i going to sleep tonight without thinking of her?

2 days ago, on sunday --- wonderful day to celebrate a birthday, isn't it?
but things were just not meant to be, i guess.

happy birthday, Z.
on the day before yesterday's yesterday.

you never cried because you were too terrified of everything to let yourself feel!
you'd have to learn crying from a manual!
chop onions!

i never cried because i was too tough --- but i felt everything.
every slight, every pressure, every vague competition.
but i fought.
and i won!
and the people i fought were happy that i won!
happy! .... after a while!!!

alfred, do you have any idea how many people in this town worship me?

maybe that's the attraction --- you don't worship me.
maybe i'd quit loving you if you did worship me.
maybe.... i'd lose all respect for you if you did all the things i want you to do.

alfred, you've got to change!
listen... i'm not saying i'm better or stronger than you are.
it's just that we --- you and i --- have different temperaments.
and my temperament is better and stronger than yours!!!

you're a wall!
you don't fight!
you hardly even listen!

dear God, will somebody please explain to me why i think you're so beautiful?

[little murders]

i did the above monologue for my drama exam a week ago. thought i'd show you what the lines were like.... boy! i actually typed all that out without referring. my memory not bad eh? haha. oh... what would i pay ABBA to sing to me "you are the drama queen, young and...." oops! before i get rotten apples and eggs thrown at me, i'd better not continue the word after "young". heh.

today is saturday, the 14th of september. exams are in 9 days. N-I-N-E days.
what do i have left to do?

2 very disgusting environment projects that weigh tonnes on my shoulders, thats 1 (okay, 2) of the very important things... undone, untouched and unthought.

history of ideas 1200 word essay on seneca and his views on anger (can't his parents just SLEPT STILL on bed that fateful night??? SHIT!!!)

not to mention, lots and lots of homework. ah yes. PSYCHOLOGY. hmm....

can't get the depeche mode song out of my head.

i want somebody to share, share the rest of my life
share my innermost thoughts, know my intimate details
someone will stand by my side, and give me support
and in return, he'll get my support
he will listen to me, when i want to speak
about the world we live in, and life in general...
[somebody - depeche mode]

i changed all the "she"s to "he"s, by the way.

today was a HILARIOUS one right from the start. early in the morning around 3, before piggy and i said good nite via sms ----

me: eh wait! weather girl, what's the forecast like for the weather in melbourne tomorrow?

piggy, after a few mins of online research: this morning's weather will range from a ridiculous high of 11'C to a chilly low of 3'C.

me, trying to be lame: yeah whatever. *grunts and switches off tv* shut up bitch.

piggy and i thought my reply was damn damn damn HILARIOUS. don't you just agree with me?

ok, i know its hard for you to feel the same because u are just reading it off from the web. but that at exact moment, the both of us JUST couldn't stop. =) still don't agree? well that's ok, you probably don't belong to the same frequency. Ooooo.....

the afternoon wasn't so bad. three of us (blue beanie gang) went down to town (err actually the CHINA one... *oops* hey guys! shall we just change our gang-name to CT kids, jus like wat maggie likes to call us?? haha!!! i can imagine piggy going "NooooOoOoooooOoo!!!!!!"). ok so we went to chinatown for lunch. teriyaki chicken sushi from "oishii sushi"... which was damn good!!! had to eat really slowly becos *dunno why* my jaw started to hurt badly. ewww. probably chewed too much gum. piggy's fault!!!!

then we went to "comics R'us" at bourke street. searching for the dunno what transformers generation 1 mini-issue series for Z. didnt manage to get the 6 issues (as usual, cos its like SOLD OUT everywhere) BUT i bought this entire unicron saga instead. in the words of the helpful guy at e counter, "its quality reading! definitely worth it!" ah well. the words of a salesman. but i think i do believe him. at the rate they seem to be in high demand, it's hard not to believe that the transformers are winning over the hearts and minds (and MONEYS!!!!) of guys from our generation. sheesh! transformers ---- robots in disguise!! haha!!! its so literal!! who would have thought that these big and clumsy-looking robots are so lethal.... so brilliant of making the boys spend their parents' every single cent on them.... Ooooo..... :p ah well. childhood.

the phrase "ein volk, ein reich, ein fuhrer" is soooo embedded in my head after my MnC lecturer/tutor drilled it in today. haha. it means "one people, one country, one leader!" wah lau!!!!! reminds me of that national day song... haha... one people, one nation, one spore!!! cos we had a lecture on propaganda. i enjoyed it alot! ah.... and that reminds me.... just yesterday, Pooh frantically smsed me after his accounts tutorial, practically screaming out loud in his msg "guess what? ron bell IS gay! etc etc". i shant go into detail HOW it was confirmed.... too lengthy... oh well. whatever. i think he's cool still!!!

Ron Rox. hey! alliteration!! Ha ha...

EIN VOLK, EIN REICH, EIN FUHRER!!!!!!!!!!


only the faithful piano speaks to me
all day --
the old cello lies asleep
silently.
you made it this clear
i understand
i know
you feel nothing at all

don't be puzzled at seeing a banana appearing on my blog screen... why?... cos the banana has never been one of my favourite fruits. eeky dry feeling stuck in your throat after gobbling it down. and a kind of weird after-taste on the tongue that lingers around.
but then again, this is just a quiz. it just says here, that i am a banana. upbeat and mellow... etc.... u read the rest.
oh yeah, and if u want to try it out to see what you are, click on it. yeah... the banana.... not me! argh!!!!

am i really a banana?

as i write this blog here, my mind keeps thinking (and worrying) about Z and family back home. Don't have a clue as to how they are coping. Don't know how serious things are. Sometimes i wish Z would just tell me...

all i do each night is pray...

Which random phallic object are you?
Quiz by Andrea.

i called home this evening, but the line was busy.
then it hit me ---- just how many times has my phone been used without my knowing?!
as the days go by, it simply pisses me off more and more... BUT i just won't say anything.
it's just me, i guess.
maybe i'm too nice. or maybe i'm just hypocritical. oh well.

spent quite a bit of time worrying about and praying for Z's mum... (well actually for the whole family too)
heard she went for some test this morning and the report will be out in a couple of days.
sighz. i really hope everything will turn out fine.

Lady Rain.... I hear you at my window
Lady Rain.... I need you softly falling on my face
Why did the sunshine come and take you away?
I'd wait for you again, my Lady Rain....

hmm... this old song just came to my head during lunch with M and S today =)

it finally hit me... she's left and it's time for me to grow up and face reality.
the reality that i cannot expect my family to be always around when i need them...
independence day was never the 4th of july.
it starts today.
dammit.