Melody.

Valentine's Day 2007 is less than a week away, and I am, once again, without a V-Day date. This is not a case of sour grapes but it's not like I really want or need one anyway, considering the love cynic I have grown to become. I have, however, consolidated a list of qualities I would like to see in my ideal partner (assuming he exists), with reference to my past crushes and ex-loves. Note that those highlighted in bold are qualities that cannot be absent.

1) Plays at least one musical instrument (an ability to sing is a bonus)

2) Plays or at least watches soccer (my ultimate definition of manhood)

3) Is free-spirited; does not like conforming to social norms; different; unique

4) Communicates well in English (billingualism in Mandarin would also be welcome with open arms, better still if he speaks Japanese)

5) Is NOT repulsively ugly

6) Is at least 1.73 m in height (I need someone relatively taller to balance it out)

7) Shares my taste in music

8) Appreciates movies, Hollywood-produced and indie flicks alike

9) Reads (fiction or non-fiction I don't care but please just READ)

10) Possesses intelligence and wit

11) Possesses a good sense of humour

12) Is well-educated

13) Likes coffee and can differentiate between macchiato, cappuccino and latte

14) Is dark-haired (i.e. no blondes, natural or unnatural)

15) Is family-oriented (mummy's boys are reluctantly acceptable)

16) Eats whatever I don't or can't finish

17) Has an OK dress sense (bonus points given for cologne/fragrance)

18) Is reflective, thoughtful and idealistic

19) Is kind to animals and the elderly; compassionate

20) Puts up with my shitty behaviour

21) Gets along well with my parents, family and close friends

22) Clean shaven (scruffy look accepted in exceptional cases)

Any straight (gay and bisexual also welcome on case-by-case basis, I am extremely gay-friendly) male human being out there who believes he fits the bill or would like to get to know me better is welcome to send in an application via email by Tuesday, February 13th. Please attach a non-Photoshopped recent (within one year) picture of yourself.

Thank you.